Well she left and guess what? He made good on his threat to kill her in the most vicious manner possible. Even after she was clearly dead, he continued to fire shots at her lifeless body. Power. Rage. Control. He was going to have the final say by any means necessary. He wanted to show her who “wears the trousers” even after the end! Now she’s gone and he is facing life imprisonment.
Sometimes leaving an abusive relationship is just as dangerous if not more so than actually staying in it. If you find yourself in this position, please take steps to plan for your safety and do not take anything for granted. Seek advice from your national domestic abuse helpline or contact a domestic abuse organisation with counsellors who may be able to advice and help safeguard you during the transition.
Misogyny is rife. The patriarchy is real!
This woman was clearly afraid and just wanted to live. She probably thought by leaving and moving on with her life, she would avoid infuriating him further and find some peace. Little did she know that she was married to an egotistical narcissist who will take matters into his own hands, when things don’t go his way.
I will continue to advocate for open and honest conversations about how we view “wearing the trousers” as a society and what we choose to accept as gender norms because at the root of all of this “madness” are harmful stereotypes that lead people to either participate in or tolerate unacceptable and dangerous behaviour. Misogyny is rife. The patriarchy is real!
Far too many stay and suffer in silence until the very end. I salute Barbara for not letting the fear of shame or stigma stop her and for finding the courage to leave and just wish things played out differently for her.
Feature image: The irony of this image is that it was probably one of the happiest days of her life. But also the beginning of the end of it. It is a picture of her on the day she said I do. I have a thousand and one what-ifs that I could ask. Source: sankofaradio.com
In recent years, there has been a troubling rise in violence against women and girls in the UK, often linked to aggressive reactions to rejection, highlighting the urgent need for comprehensive education on healthy relationships and consent to foster mutual respect and reduce such violence.
Raye made history at the 2024 Brit Awards, securing four awards, including Best British Female Solo Artist and Best British Artist. I unpack the lyrics of her song “Ice Cream Man” which metaphorically captures the hidden dangers of domestic abuse, prompting a reflection on the challenges survivors face.
A reflection on the importance of addressing men’s mental health struggles, challenging stigmas, and fostering a supportive environment.
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